Once the middle fingers started flying, Stacey Chiarolanza knew she had to do something.
The owner of Aunt B’s Ice Cream in Brigantine posted on social media in mid July, and in the shop itself, asking customers to be more patient — moreover to stop harassing and throwing garbage at her largely teen-aged staff — as the shop dealt with long lines and favorite flavors out of stock.
“Chances are if you’re standing here ordering ice cream you are having a good day, so please pass the positivity to us,” the message read.
Such was the latest in a string of ugly outbursts involving fed-up customers and food service workers, as the industry attempts to navigate a not-quite-post-COVID dining world.
As customers rush back to full-capacity dining rooms around New Jersey, eateries of all sort — from fine dining to ice cream parlors — flounder beneath a nationwide labor shortage and encompassing supply chain crisis.
A sign at Aunt B's Ice Cream in Brigantine, posted after a slew of unruly customers. (Photo courtesy of Aunt B's Ice Cream)
If you’ve gone out to dinner this year, you’ve likely already seen it: Wait times are longer, popular dishes are out of stock and, in general, the entire dining experience has become a lesson in patience and empathy.
But customers aren’t always so understanding, especially as they attempt to make up for lost leisure time.
“Just because you can take your mask off now, that (doesn’t mean) everything goes back to normal for everyone,” Chiarolanza told NJ Advance Media. “They think ‘I’m here now, I want this now. This is my summer, I didn’t get a summer last year.’ They just get really upset when you don’t have what they’re used to.”
NJ Advance Media spoke to multiple restaurant owners and workers about customer behavior since COVID-19 capacity restrictions were lifted in May. While many emphasized most customers have been polite, they admitted others are loudly unsympathetic and have caused scenes rarely seen in pre-pandemic dining.
“Everyone’s still a bit on edge and acting out,” Chiarolanza said. “In the service industry, you’re that frontline person. You get the brunt of it.”
Last month at Bistro 14, a seafood restaurant in Beach Haven, a customer berated staff so badly over poor service that several employees were in tears, owner Karen Vaughan said. After an initial report of the incident, the customer emailed NJ Advance Media refuting the severity of their malcontent.
Either way, Vaughan decided to shut the oyster bar down the next afternoon and took her team to lunch instead.
“I don’t know if it’s 15 months of COVID-related stress that everybody’s just kind of finally figuring all out for themselves, or if somebody’s just having a bad day, and they feel they have to take it out on someone else,” Vaughan said. “When someone gets it in their mind that their experience is not what they felt it should be, it’s really hard to change their mind.”
Also on Long Beach Island, ice cream shop Barry’s Do Me A Flavor posted on social media in early July that it shut down for a night after their staff was verbally abused “to the point of tears.”
“We are trying our best,” the note read. “Please remember that there are human beings behind the counter serving you.”
When Vicky began serving at a Jersey City restaurant last August, she was blown away by customers’ appreciation. People were just happy to be out of their homes, she said.
But now, the honeymoon is very much over, she noted, as gratitude has devolved into entitlement.
“It’s not that they aren’t nice now, but you can tell who hasn’t been out in a long time because they’re immediately demanding,” said Vicky, who asked for her last name and the name of her restaurant not be used for fear of retribution from her employer.
Vicky’s restaurant has been slammed with customers since restrictions were lifted, and managing in-person dining plus takeout has led to occasional long waits for food.
“It’s families that get pushier because they have kids that want to eat sooner, but overall, people are clearly just wanting to return to normalcy any way they can get it,” Vicky said. “I’ll have one rude, pushy table for every 10, but it’s still more than before.”
Ben Sanders, a server at Turtle + The Wolf in Montclair and a 12-year restaurant industry veteran believes the pandemic has only amplified bad behavior.
“I don’t think the pandemic changed the numbers of people who are ‘difficult’ or ‘good’ customers so much as it’s caused those people to essentially double down,” Sanders said. “Regular customers who would’ve tipped 25% in the before times are tipping like 30 to 40%, and people who were kinda rude or entitled are now incredibly self-entitled, demanding and arrogant.”
The cruel irony is New Jersey restaurants need those customers now more than ever. The pandemic ravaged profits and closed hundreds of Garden State businesses. But the labor shortage has simply left restaurants unequipped.
Dana Lancellotti, the president and CEO of the New Jersey Restaurant and Hospitality Association, has heard from countless constituents about staffing issues that lead to delays and, in turn, angry customers.
“We really hope people can prepare to be a little more patient than normal,” Lancellotti said. “They really are doing the best they can with what they have.”
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Jeremy Schneider may be reached at jschneider@njadvancemedia.com and followed on Twitter at @J_Schneider and on Instagram at @JeremyIsHungryAgain.
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